Why Stalking My Ex Made Me Move On
by Jaime Chan
Source: Cultura Colectiva
You look forward to seeing them. You think about them all the time. You want to spend every minute together. Every joke they make makes you giggle. You stay up late just to talk about sweet nothings over the phone. You are so in love with this person you would do anything for them.
Remember you used to feel that way in the beginning of most relationships? Everything about your other half was perfect. Even when they snore at night, you thought it was cute. When they tell a lame joke, you thought it was the funniest joke you’ve ever heard!
Some started off as a fling, relationships you thought wouldn’t last. It was almost as if they were tourists, stopping by for a while, exploring and having fun. And before you know it, they become permanent residents in your heart. They were here to stay (or so you thought).
Then, your relationship started spiraling downwards, and your rose-coloured glasses came off faster than Taylor Swift’s break-ups.
Suddenly, the snores at night weren’t so cute anymore. When they tell a lame joke, you roll your eyes so far back, they reach the back of your head.
It was only a matter of time before the both of you call it quits. Some end on good terms, while some are no longer on talking terms.
But no matter how they end, break-ups are mostly heartbreaking.
The first few days, weeks, or even months, are the worst. You constantly wonder how they’re doing or if they miss you. No matter how many times you tell yourself not to care, you end up thinking about them, again. And with the existence of social media, it certainly doesn’t help that they’re just one tap away.
Just one tap, and you can see what they’ve been up to. Just one tap, you can see if they’re dating anyone new. And with that one tap, your heart starts to shatter all over again. But still, you can’t seem to stop yourself from stalking them on social media.
Friends and family keep telling you to stop checking on their social media. On several occasions, you even attempted to block them. But as human beings, it’s in our nature to want what we can’t have or do. If you’re being told that you should stop looking at your ex’s social media, it only makes you want to do it even more! So, you know what?
Stalk your heart out.
Check out their Instagram or Facebook. You’ll find yourself missing them so much your heart aches when you look at their pictures. But it’s okay.
Stalk your heart out.
Every picture you see may spark old memories. You’ll remember all the good times you had and before you can stop it, tears start welling up. Do you stop, or do you go on? That’s right.
Continue to stalk your heart out.
Because after a while, it will start to hurt less. You may even start to notice imperfections. “Was his teeth always so crooked?” “What’s with that man bun?” “Why did I even like him in the first place?”
By allowing yourself the freedom to stalk your ex on social media, you’re also helping yourself to move on. It’s easier to move on when you’re not constantly wondering what’s going on with them. It’s easier to heal a wound when you tend to them, rather than ignoring the pain. It’s easier to come to terms with something when you deal with them, and not avoid them.
So, to move on, stalk your ex on social media.
If you want to check on their Instagram every day, go for it. You’ll start off stalking them daily. Then, once every few weeks. And then, once every few months. Until finally, one day you’ll find yourself thinking “Sh*t, I can’t even remember my ex’s name.”
Disclaimer: We only recommend stalking your ex(es) on social media, not in person. Please don’t ever do that.
You may also find Jaime on Instagram.