Habits You Need to Quit If You're an Adult
Updated: Apr 6, 2019
by Emily Goh. |
Do you ever get that feeling, like you are in your twenties, and you are supposed to be this fully functioning, got-everything-together, fully independent adult; but you just don’t feel you are there yet?
Sometimes, to take a major leap in life, you need to be eliminating bad habits and replacing them with good ones.
We are talking about the kind of habits that are guilty pleasures we secretly indulge in, the ones that we know are bad for us, and yet we keep going back to them.
But if you really want to step up to be the best version of yourself, we gotta make a conscious decision curb these self-sabotaging habits once and for all and replace them with ones that will benefit us.
1. Complaining or Whining About Little Things
Most of us “indulge” in a lot of ranting. Be it complaining about the traffic, about our clients or coworkers, or even random happenings we encounter throughout our day; we all do it.
As much as it is a comforting thing to be able to release your frustrations, when you indulge too often in complaining, it becomes a bad habit. When you are ranting, you are fueling your frustrations without actually doing something about the problem.
What You Can Do Instead:
Focus on only the important things. Don’t sweat the small stuff, because why get yourself annoyed and flustered at things that are not even significant?
If you really need to rant, limit yourself to talk about it for a certain time. Tell yourself “I’d let myself rant about this for 15 minutes, then I am going to move on from it.”
Also, you should find only a couple of people whom you trust 100%, be it a best friend, partner or family member to rant to. There is really no need to complain and whine to everyone around you. It can come across as annoying and draining to others, and also toxic for you to keep focusing on ranting instead of finding a solution.
2. Basing your Self Worth based on Other People
Image: Emily Coxhead
This is very apparent especially in our Malaysian culture. From young, we are taught to see success relative to other people. Being first in class, getting better results compared to our neighbour’s kid etc.
But when you are a working adult, this perception of success by comparing to other people is no longer healthy. If we are constantly trying to supersede someone else, we may become very entitled and bitter.
Imagine, you finally got a raise at work. While you are supposed to be celebrating your success, you are sulking because you know your pay is not as high as your colleague in another department. Or when things are going great for you, but just because you see someone living the “ideal” life on social media, you wish you had the lifestyle they have.
Toxic, huh? This habit is downright self-sabotaging, while at the same time, prevent you from being a good friend that celebrates other people’s achievements and successes.
What You Can Do Instead:
Base your self worth in relation to your own journey. Determine what are truly important milestones that matter to you personally, and work towards them. Acknowledge your achievements based on your own goals and stop always using other people as your benchmark.
And when your friends receive good news, celebrate their successes with them genuinely. Just because someone else is successful, doesn't make your achievements any less. Always remember this and you will be a much happier person.
3. Limit mindless entertainment
Be it scrolling social media aimlessly, or binge watching your favourite sitcoms for the umpteenth time, we do enjoy a good super chill and relaxing downtime doing something completely effortless. There is nothing wrong with enjoying some mindless unwind, there
However, There is nothing wrong with enjoying some mindless unwind, when it takes up most of your leisure time, it becomes very counter productive.
What You Can Do Instead:
When we spend most of our time going through our daily grind of work and routine, we may become stagnant in our own personal development.
Hence, it's good to challenge yourself to spend some time to learn something new each day. It can be something very small, like listening to a 10 minutes podcast on your way to work, reading a news article while you have breakfast, or even watching a short documentary before bed.
Accumulatively, you would find yourself to be a more well informed person, and maybe even contribute to your career or personal development.
There you have it, these 3 toxic habits you need to take conscious effort to quit, even if you don’t really want to. Just like walking away from friends or exes who are bad for you, walking away from these habits (as much as it is more comfortable to stick with them), will make improve your quality of life, and make you a better individual.