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Annoying Things Girlfriends Do During CNY

by Caitlin Tan

Red packets will not be the only thing driving the boys crazy during Chinese New Year. The girlfriends will too! As a fellow girlfriend myself, I must admit that I do have the capability to unintentionally turn my boyfriend’s face as Ong as the Ang Pows I will be receiving in my hands.

Bao Bei, You Gym Right?

Remember how we had to highlight our entire textbook during exam season? That’s the mall during Chinese New Year. It’s Ong Ong Ong everywhere we go!

We ladies have a talent for last minute festive shopping. Despite having such a short amount of time, we somehow manage to purchase not only our necessities but back-ups for our back-ups as well.

All we really need are enough dresses for 3 or 4 days but some of us do end up with a year’s worth of supply instead, oops! In reality, most of our shopping trips result in too many bags for only a pair of arms.

Thankfully, we never need to worry about the load. CNY is the annual chance for our boyfriends (or rented boyfriends. no judgement), to flex their arm strength!

Lai, let’s test it out. It’s time to showcase your biceps.

Can Fetch Me Ah?

The toughest thing when it comes to CNY shopping? Having to drive around looking for parking! Then after, to search for stores that are still open to satiate our last minute requirements.

Cab fare? HUAT!

Festive season cab fares are usually unreasonably high due to the traffic and influx of passengers. RM15 for a 5 minute drive? No, thank you.

Weather? HUAT!

If it weren’t for the Chinese New Year heat and our tropical weather, we would much rather walk.

HUAT can we do?

We save ourselves the trouble by setting our boyfriends on speed-dial.

As much as we would want to deny it, the best part is not having to rush that 5-minute waiting time when he arrives. I mean, perfection takes time.

Dear, Can We Go Now?

When you’re in a relationship, you tend to acquaint yourselves with each other’s social circles.

However, men are from Mars & women are from Venus. It’s not always easy to relate.

The festive season does not come without obligation. This means that we have to ‘guai guai’ accompany our other halves to open houses. Unfortunately for the boys, we can be quite demanding, right? Especially when the boy talk comes in - Dota? Cars? Computer parts?

“Dear, can we go soon?”

in other words, would mean..

“If you want to keep your girlfriend, we’re going now.”

On the other hand, paiseh, equality may be quite rare when it’s the girl’s turn to bond.

“We will leave soon” means “You love me right? Stay another hour.”

Take heart, boys. We don’t mean bad intentions.

One More Photo Please?

Our boyfriends pray and pray to no avail. It’s going to happen.

Trying to enjoy your feast in peace? Next thin you know, you’ve got to put your “Instagram Boyfriend” hat on.

It’ll start with a couple of photos followed by a couple of feedbacks; the phrase “one more, please!” will cease to exist. Before you know it, there’ll be a burst shots of over 200 shots. That is only the beginning! There will be more photogenic spots to explore at other open houses and on different days!

Oh, if only it ends there. Our boyfriends will then have to be the critique to their own work by choosing the best photo out of 200 similar ones.

Do I Look Fat?

Source: Joy Time

“I only get to eat this once a year.”

What’s your kryptonite? Pineapple Tarts, Love Letters or ‘Bak-Gua’?

We all know that yearly cheongsam struggle all too well. All of us want to fit in that cheongsam but we also want to fit as many treats as possible before the season is over! Let’s not kid ourselves, there’s no such thing as control.

This is when our boyfriends magically become our favourite artist. Top hits include “You’re Not Fat”, “ I’m not lying” & “Yes, I still love you.”

These songs will be on loop until the radio also ‘sien’.

Ed Sheeran who?

With that said, boyfriends, remember, happy wife, happy life!

All jokes aside, take this article light-heartedly because not all girlfriends are like that.

Trust me 😉

With that, to those celebrating, we wish you a prosperous and great Chinese New Year!

You may also find Caitlin on Instagram.

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