5 Things to Remember When Things are Going Wrong
by Fatin Hafizah. |
In a blink of an eye, we are already in the new decade. Personally, last year has not been the easiest for me. In fact, it might have been one of the hardest years of my life. From feeling stagnant in life to a broken relationship, 2019 had me hit rock bottom. For a while, my whole world was crumbling and I thought I had lost the courage to live. So, believe me when I say, I know how difficult it is to push forward when everything inside you is broken. I’m sure most of us had felt this way; so on days when you feel like this, here are some of the things I want you to remember:
1. Change is the only constant in life
It’s easy to be stuck in a moment and wallow in your sadness. When not channelled properly, we even tend to let the wrongs in our life define us. When these moments strike, remind yourself that life goes on and change is inevitable. In fact, the only thing that is constant in life is change. Like everything else in this world, this can be both good and bad. When facing hardships, please remember that where you are right now is not your final destination. You may feel defeated but you don’t have to stay feeling defeated for the rest of your life. What’s past is past and greater days are ahead and only you have the power to seize it.
2. There is no ending, only new beginnings
When things fall apart, you can’t help but feel like your whole world is crumbling. Trust me, I’ve been there; but do keep in mind when things come to an end, it ends for a reason. It may take a while for you to see the whole silver lining but have faith that certain things need to end to make way for something better. Every road leads to a new path; it only becomes a dead end when you give up. Starting over or starting something new may be hard but once you’re on the journey, you will see that life goes on and starting over is not as scary as your mind made it seem to be.
3. Take the lessons and grow from it
Nothing that happened in our life happened without a reason. There are reasons for it and like the old saying goes, experience is the best teacher. So, whatever it was that you went through, be it because of your own mistake or other people’s mistake, ask yourself, “What are the important lessons I can learn from this?”. It would be a shame to just let things go as they were. There is always a lesson for us to take from everything that happened to us. As painful as the lesson might be, it is needed for us to grow and reach our life’s purpose. So, step back, take your time to heal, then ponder on what the pain has taught you. That is the only way you can grow.
4. Every little effort counts
You may think you are not doing much to get out of your slump but if you succeeded in getting yourself out of the bed today, then you are doing something! Never trivialize your success — no matter how small it is. An act as simple as making up your bed, brushing your teeth, or taking a shower is considered a success. This rule can also be used when trying to reach your goals. No goals can be achieved overnight or in just one step. It takes gradual but continuous effort. Don’t be obsessed with achieving things quickly, be mindful of making little effort consistently that will one day lead to greater success.
5. It’s okay not to be okay
Yes, it sounds cliché, but I am a firm believer that if you feel like crying, just cry. Let those tears out. You don’t have to keep it all together 24/7. No one is okay all the time and you should not let people make you believe that they have it all together all the time. Everyone is battling their own struggles, so stay focused on battling yours. At times when you think the fight is too much for you, please find the courage to reach out for help. Remember that reaching out for help is nothing to be embarrassed about, so if you need other people to help you heal, all you have to do is just ask.
Obstacles and challenges are something we all must face; life wouldn’t be complete without it. It is not going to be an easy battle but once you have overcome your struggles, you emerge with more understanding and wisdom; and you will see meaning in your life again. Keep holding on and have faith that things will get better and you can survive this. To those of you who are struggling and starting anew, I pray that you can find the courage to be kind to yourself, and allow yourself to be bent, but not broken.
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